==tulip speaks==

Happy New Year guys! Hope everyone got my New Year testimonial Just wanted to share a New Year wallpaper with you all. Was done in a hurry and nothing great.. but I guess you can pardon me for that.

Download 1024*768 | 800*600

Many has mistaken that my previous post When It Ends was
dedicated to a person. Indeed it was a post meant for all of us. A post
for the year 2006 which we are going to wave goodbye this midnight.
Some going to do it in style - like in parties and some going to let it
go with teary eyes - like me. Does it going to mark the end of many things? May be…

Standing
right on the last day of the year 2006, we are looking at another year
of hope - 2007. While I believe its going to be adventurous, only God
knows what He actually has in the plan for me. Nevertheless, I’m seeing
it as a start of a new life. A brand new life.

I
came from a modest background- spending my early years running around
rubber and palm oil plantation. I find school as the most exciting
place when I was growing up. Enough said about my childhood days, my
teens was not boring either. With bunch of schoolboys running after you
(ahem..ahem), it was fun indeed. I put my mark in the academic field
when I was in my teens. Somehow it slowly deteriorate when I reach my
late teens. Too bad for an ambitious girl like me.

I’ve spoke
alot about my early uni days in my previous post. Don’t wish to repeat
them. Yet, I would say the last 3 years were the most challenging years
in my life so far. I sank to the bottom and it was so hard to get up. I
thought of quitting my studies couple of times, saved only by true
friends and family who stood by me. I struggled through my postgraduate
studies. I met so many people; did so many mistakes and learnt lots of
lessons too. I still can’t believe I’m done with my viva, and waiting
for my graduation ceremony. It was that challenging. I still have some
unfinished business, somethings that hanging on my life refusing me to
move into a new phase of life. I want to let go of many things, but the
memory stays. Its like you came so close and yet, it still so far.

Simply put, life has lessons in store for us. we may or may not like
it but we have a discipline master waiting at the end of each day,
teaching us a new lesson everyday. When we started to crawl, we afraid
to walk; when we started to walk, we afraid to run; when we started to
run, we afraid to fall; when we fell, aren’t we suppose to stand up and
start running again? How many times we actually fell but refused to
stand up again? And don’t you realise that the older we gets, the
harder it is for us to stand up? Looking back, isn’t it more fun to
just stay as a child? No worries, no sorrow. And the best part - we
never think twice standing up no matter how many times we fall.
Beautiful childhood memories.

To those who knows me well, you
guys know what I’m talking about. And you all also know how much does a
PhD means to me. Once I’m over with masters, the next question that I
was asked about was regarding my further studies. I’m really touched by
souls who cared so much for me, by those who genuinely wished for my
happiness and success. I owe so much to you guys. But when my mind is
still blurred with things that happened in 2006/05, I doubt I will be
able to continue my PhD anytime soon. It may or may not happen in 2007.
But my wish to obtain a doctorate will definitely come true.

My wishes for 2007 is simple. I want to live again.

p/s: you may also wanna read THIS, THIS and THIS.

I did.

Helpless. Angry. Sad.

As I was unable to log in Blogger
properly yesterday. I manage to write few comments before the ‘traffic’ became
standstill. You might not understand what I mean if you did not log in yesterday
or hosting your blog in local server. Read HERE
and HERE .
I always say to others that we usually take alot of things for granted. We
assume everything and everyone will be with us and things will always be the
same all the time. Thats not the case. And yesterday I experienced it
myself.

It might sound silly that being unable to blog taught me a
lesson. But to bloggers who love what they are doing - literally meaning the
‘true’ bloggers, they would understand what I am trying to say. Definitely they
would know how much blogging means as an expression of ourselves. Its a mean of
communication between me and those whom I consider close to my heart. Don’t be
surprise if I say I keep in touch with most of the bloggers only via the blogs -
not YM, not orkut, not e-mails.

When that mode of communication taken
away from me, I feel helpless. When I was not allowed to roam around freely in
the blogsphere, I feel angry. And when I am unable to express myself, I feel
sad. Did you feel what I felt?

Its end of the year.. and my workplace is
deserted.. my blogmates all on holiday.. I’m dead bored!!! Seriously, I feel
like I’m stuck on the same date for days! Ish.. this is bad.. I mean really BAD.
I just can’t wait for the NEW YEAR.

Watch a video I posted from YouTube HERE. The video looks messy when it goes out of the alignment. But it worth watching.
A scene I never get bored watching over and over again.

I
always have this thing for dogs. May be because I grew up with pet
dogs. First it was Tiger, but I can’t really remember him. Was too
young back then. Then, it was Bobby - a huge golden brown dog whom I
love to ride on. lolz. I was about 4 yrs old then. After that, we had
few dogs whom we named Dumeen - no idea why. After the last Dumeen
died, we didn’t have any more pet dogs until my uncle’s friend decided
to gave away her Australian Silky Terriers. I mentioned about it HERE,
but recently I took couple of pics of Boy & Girl which I have since
uploaded in my personal flickr account. Didn’t know what to do, so
decided to make a cute wallpaper out of their pics. Check it out.

Download it! 1024*768| 800*600

Now that you have decided to wave goodbye…

How do you feel about it?   Satisfied with what you have done so far?   Delighted that it has come to an end now?   Feeling incomplete thinking of your decision?  Thinking of reversing and putting things in order again?  Brushing things aside and "moving on" with your life?  Again, when we say moving on with one’s life.. is it always viable?   Is it possible to actually move on?  Can we work on something else instead?  Something that will bring happiness to your loved ones? to yourself?  Have you lived our life for yourself all this while?  Have you done everything you ever wanted?  Does this 365 days holds your life long memories?

Why do you wanna say GOODBYE?

Just blabbered somethings that came to my mind.
Thanks
for the wishes for my viva presentation. All went on well and I’ve
passed with minor corrections. Muuuaxxx and hugsss to all who prayed
for me. God bless all.

Hey guys, I was off for a short holiday in Kuantan for the weekend.
Came back 3 hours ago and my body is still aching bcoz of the journey.
But it was a well-deserved holiday. Phhewww.. Uploaded some pics
here, and some in my personal flickr account (which only some have the
link). Have to get ready for my viva presentation scheduled on
Thursday. So, won’t be updating or blog-hop till then. I still owe
replies to comments on the previous post. Will reply once I’m over with
my viva.

11th Dec
Mom’s birthday
She is 52 this year and refused to cut cake *sigghhh.. I put up a birthday post for her last year. You can read it HERE.

Sultan Selangor’s birthday, literally meaning a public holiday
Being a proud resident of the state of Selangor for 26 years, can’t help but to praise the Sultan of Selangor. At some instances, we might and have felt neglected. I would be telling you why in future posts. But generally, despite bad publicity surrounding royalties, current Sultan of Selangor seems to be a person who really cares for the people of Selangor. I guess he make public announcements more than the King himself! He steps in whenever any controversy arise. Even restricted the state-award to maintain the integrity of the titles. A squatter-free and the richest state, Selangor provides rice bowl to thousands of people of other states as well. Proud of my birth soil!

Wedding
Its Prady’s sister’s wedding day. Being held in Mangalore, its impossible for me to attend. Nevertheless my best wishes to the new couple. Prady owes me aloooooooooooot of snaps.

Friend’s gathering
A small get-together at the TGI Fridays last night was fun indeed. Besides the delicious menu, we had hunks as waiters as well. Come to eat & stay for fun - thats their tag line and I think it can’t be better

12th Dec
Superstar Rajini’s birthday..phhewwit!
He is 57. So what? He is still Tamil’s superstar!

14th Dec
My lovely sister’s birthday
Must I elaborate more? Her previous birthday dedication was HERE - A must read.

16th Dec
Going to a place far away* still on discussion

I’m not a Christian but X’mas decors always attract me. Sharing some pics I took in Midvalley Megamall, Kuala Lumpur. As  frenster blog is not allowing embedded codes, please visit my  BLOG to  see the rest of the snaps. Thos who have link to my private FLICKR may view them there also.

[Updated] Had a lazy Sunday and
decided to photoshop my snap.. turn out to be wht I use as my current
wallpaper. So, to all my fans out there (ahem)..this one for you!

Download it! 1024*768 | 800*600

You were born a Christian..lived
as a Christian…fell in love with a Muslim and
converted to
Islam..Fell out of love..return to christianity..and you die..your
family is grieving…going to claim you from morgue..a bunch of Muslim
officials came along..claiming that you are a Muslim….show some
papers..wanna take you away..your wife says no..she is going to the
court..she wants you..you know she has all the rights..and you know you
messed up a little when you were alive, but some what rectified it..but
now what? you couldn’t defend yourself..lying there cold and motionless
in the morgue..while your loved ones fought for your dead body.. and
eventually won after a week of battle.

Read more: HERE, HERE and HERE 

This
is one of the most famous issues in Malaysia in recent times - the
issue of Muslim converts. While I believe such incidences been in
existance since a very long time, the tussle between late Moorty’s
family and Muslim authority which made it public. Personally, I’m not a
fanatic, and i have many Muslims friends. But I do feel that the
authorities be more careful when dealing with converts. Both Moorthy’s
and Rayappan’s issue raised many questions:

1. Why would a person let to convert his religion without informing his family?
Although
the consititution reserves everyone’s religious rights, their decision
to convert would affect the family and as such, it should be made known
to their immediate family members.

2. Does one’s
intention to convert is made basely on his intention to marry a Muslim,
or made based on his/her love for the new religion?

3.
If one is not genuine in his intention, why would the authority allow
him/her to convert? Is it just to for the numbers? Is he/she just being
a statistics here?

4.
Lets say the person converted but do not follow any principles of Islam
- consumed non-halal food, didn’t fast during Ramadan, consumed
alcohols, never paid zakat and never even prayed in his/her life, and
eventually passed away. How would the authority justify their decision
to bury him/her with other Muslims who have fullfilled their
responsibility as a Muslim throughout their life? Doesn’t that mean a
betrayal to others in the faith?

Will they be bold enough to answer the above questions before claiming another dead body? I wonder.